love love.

In case you didn't know, I love love. I went to the library today (you remember those, you used to go there when you were little and had to write about reptiles for a school project?) and the four books cradled in my arms as I left all came from the same section – the one titled ‘romance’. In my defense, I did wander through the rest of the library, scanning shelves for anything that took my interest. I know they always tell you not to judge a book by its cover but the reality is, that’s the only way I choose my books and nothing else catches my eye the way romance novels do.

I love love songs, too. Real love songs though, the ones with meaning and feeling, not some cheesy pop song with cringe-worthy lyrics set to an upbeat tune and sung by the likes of Katy Perry or Kesha. And while romantic movies are often predictable and contain unrealistic, always happy endings, I’m still always happy to settle in to a nice, light hearted rom-com.

I love people who are in love, especially elderly couples who walk the streets holding hands, but also friends my own age, telling me how their boyfriend surprised them with candles and dinner or showing me their engagement ring and sharing the story of the proposal. I love couples even when I’m not in one. Especially when I’m not in one because they keep me believing in love.

   

I should, however, disclose the fact that I’ve never been in a truly horrible relationship. Sure, there’s only really one instance in my life where I was the one who chose to end the relationship (and even then you’ll get an argument out of the guy about how ‘he wanted to end it too and it was at least mutual’). Mostly I am the one who gets left and left wondering why. But that’s not the type of thing to dampen my spirits. With each failed relationship, I take my lesson with me, happy for the experience, and move on.

I think one of my biggest reasons to believe so strongly in such a fickle emotion (besides being able to see it anywhere I go) is that my first example of love came from my parents. Your parents’ relationship will always have a big impact on your life. They say trouble believing in love might have something to do with your parents’ rocky relationship. I have no such trouble. Twenty-seven years on, my parents still can’t go a night without talking to each other. They still love each other’s little quirks (even if their children don’t) and they still enjoy each other’s time. They love each other, even when they’re angry at each other. They truly set the best example of love … even to my friends, some of whom tell me they’d be more distraught if my parents broke up, than if their own did.

I understand that sometimes, due to past experiences, it can be hard to trust someone with your heart. The heart is a fragile thing, and there are only too many sayings about how “loving someone is like giving them a gun pointing at your heart and trusting them not to pull the trigger”. And, as we all know, this trigger pulling can be on purpose or accidental (I’m still not sure which is worse). But no matter how many problems you face in the fight for love, how many nights you spend wishing you didn’t care so much, or it didn’t hurt so much, or whatever else it is you’re upset about, I will never understand ruling love out of your life completely. I will never understand people who don’t believe in love. Because, as one of my favourite love films will tell us, Love Actually is all around. And that always puts a smile on my face.